Silence
by FujiwaraYuko
Summary: Definition: complete absence of sound
1. Preface

**Silence: Matsuoka Rin Love Story: Free! Fan Fiction**

**FujiwaraYuko**

**Preface**

_Silence._

When I swam, you couldn't hear the swishing sounds of the waters crashing onto the rims of the pool like waves.

_Silence._

I swam only free, fly, and back.

_Silence._

Yet, no matter what stroke I used, you couldn't hear a splashing sound.

_Silence._

Swift as a coursing river. Force of a great typhoon. Strength of a raging fire.

_Silence._

Slow as the brawny eagle in full flight.

_Silence._

A special girl with talents unknown. Will anyone know the secrets and skills she withholds?

_Silence._

A sister whose brother died a swimmer's dream and legend.

_Silence._

Would she carry on his hopes and dreams? His speed and performance?

_Silence._

He left his dying wish at an academy well known—when she would ask the peers about her brother's frightful fears, would she continue the posthumous legend?

_Silence._

A friend through the midst comes to help her in her conquest wist, but would he help her all the way through all those tiring days?

_Silence._

Definition: Complete absence of sound

_Silence._

My name is Tsukuda Kiyomi, and this is my "_ e."_


	2. Chapter One: The Beginning of a New Era

**Chapter One**

**The Beginning of a New Era**

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

_"I hope you do well, Katsuo," I playfully punched my brother's arm as he simply responded with a chuckle._

_ He laughed nervously as he ran his fingers through his hair—a habit he so often did, "Youngest person at Japan's National Championships—a championship mainly for adults and professionals . . . and I somehow ended up here."_

_ "You deserved it," I smiled ruefully as he sat down on the bench by the vending machines. "All of the scouts from colleges and universities nationwide are vouching for you and all . . . You're a genius!"_

_ He grunted, "Tch. Don't get my hopes up Kiyomi."_

_ I simply rolled my eyes, "You know you like it. Don't try hiding it. Lighten up."_

_ This time, Katsuo was the one bursting out in laughter, "Hahaha! You're probably right. I shouldn't be so tense an hour before the race."_

_ I deadpanned, "I thought that was a given, Katsuo-aniki."_

_ He slapped my back playfully, though I bent a full ninety degrees downward, "Hahaha, yeah."_

_ Even though my back hurt, I managed to force a smile._

_End of Flashback_

The memories came flooding back as my back sank deeper into the seat of the desk. I was currently in my multivariable class, bored out of my mind. We were doing a test review, and, to me, the material was mediocre—not easy, not hard, but easy enough to comprehend well.

As of now, I didn't care about classes anymore.

_Swimming . . . _in silence.

At the moment, that was all my life depended on . . . continuing my brother's legacy—to be the fastest swimmer on the planet and in all its history. It was a difficult task only my brother in all of Japan would even consider. Everyone around us was either doing tennis, track, soccer, wrestling, karate, and so forth. Some people in our neighborhood did swimming as well, but they would only get competitive for recreational reasons or for fun. My brother, however, wasn't like them at all. From the moment he dove into the crystalline waters of the pool until his end . . . he was in the water nearly twenty-four seven. When he was bathing, he filled the tub with steaming water like an onsen in winter, and freezing cold water in the summer. He would finish his homework early just to go swim in the local pool, practicing laps to be quick even for fun. Or sometimes, when the pool was closed, he'd fill the tub with either cold or hot water, depending on the weather, and then stay in there and relax in there for hours upon end.

"Miss Tsukuda," the teacher gave me his classic daggered look. "Pay attention in class. I just asked you a question. Please answer it."

I shifted in my seat so that I was sitting properly before saying gently, "I am sorry, sir. Could you please reiterate the question?"

Sensei sighed, "You are very difficult to get mad at, Tsukuda. Just like your brother."

Upon saying the last phrase, he immediately shut his mouth. My brother's name or even a mere mention of him was a mutual forbidden law. It was tacit, but powerful. Anyone who broke the law was immediately shunned for a good ten seconds of his or her life.

"Ahem," he coughed. "Tsukuda, what is the answer to 2xy added to . . ."

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I slammed my locker door shut as the team picture with Tsukuda Katsuo in presence was immediately out of my view. I didn't need to mourn his death again. I was done with that at his funeral. I didn't need more memories of the best teammate any person could ever ask for—a friend, someone to console, a strong teammate, a hard worker . . . so forth.

Katsuo was popular. He could walk into a room and be friends with everyone within it—no matter what race, belief, or deformities the person had—within five minutes. It was as easy as that. Everyone in Samezuka Academy knew him—even our sister school—Takahashi Academy, an all-girls school—all knew him as well. It wasn't until about midnight that I received the news of his death. His depressing death. The worst way to die . . . _Ever._ I suppose the only up side to his presiding death was the fact that it was in his favorite place in the world . . . but that still couldn't take back the fact that he died . . . even though it was a swimmer's legend.

I then snapped out of my thoughts and directed them to the task at hand—swimming . . . for nationals . . . and, hopefully, I'd get to where he dreamed of as well . . . even though it could be light years away . . .

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

_Ding. Ding._

The bell had finally rung, and I immediately packed up my belongings and ran out of the classroom. Math was last class of the day, and I was literally done with it. After rummaging my locker for whatever other textbooks I might have needed before heading home for the weekend, I then rushed over to my bike, unlocked the chains surrounding it before biking my way home.

The air was smooth and crisp and possessed a sense of gratification within it, although it was only the mere atmosphere that contributed to this notion.

My eyes drooped to a literal ultimate low as I continued biking up the inclined hill. If not already evident, I was weary. Tired. There was nothing to look forward to at home—my brother was long gone, never to awaken again . . .

_Flashback_

_ "Number two on the panel is Tsukuda Katsuo!" the announcer spoke. "He is the youngest contestant here in high school with us today for Japan's National Championships! Number three on the panel is . . ."_

_ The speaker dragged on about the people along the panels and a little bit of their backgrounds._

_ I was on the edge of my seat, waiting for my brother to start his race. The atmosphere of the stadium was tense, yet lenient and merciful. The world seemed to revolve slowly as I awaited the announcer to finish the introductions. However, I continued to anticipate the moment when my brother would finally race . . . his race._

_End of Flashback_

I looked at the road ahead of me as I continued to bike my way home. Instead of taking the shorter route which my brother and I used to take all the time, I took the longer one, so that I wouldn't have to face nor reminisce the memories that would flood down the moment I set foot or wheel onto that plain. A single tear streaked down my tanned porcelain face as I continued to bike down the road towards home . . . The sun, like the color of strained peaches, glistened against my bike as my trek home . . . continued.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I walked down the path to Iwatobi High School to pick up Gou today, since there was no swim practice after school for the day. It was the weekend, so I decided to stay at my parents' for the two days for a brief visit.

As I reared the front entrance of the school, I leaned my back against the surrounding wall of the school building. While I awaited Gou to be dismissed from school, I began to reminisce my past with Katsuo . . .

_Flashback_

_Rin: Twelve Years Old_

_Katsuo: Thirteen Years Old_

_ "Oi, Katsuo," I summoned. "Come here."_

_ "What may you possibly need, Rin?" the said boy smiled cheerfully in English._

_ "Hahaha," I laughed. "Stop saying stuff in English, boy."_

_ Katsuo grunted, "Tch. If I do remember correctly, I am your senpai. Besides, you know English decently enough."_

_ "That is true, though I tend not to use a foreign language in Japan, dimwit," I smacked Katsuo's back playfully._

_ "Oi, oi," he deadpanned. "Don't kill me for it, man."_

_ I laughed harder than before, "Funny, bro. Real. Funny."_

_ "So, um, I didn't catch what you needed again," Katsuo sweat-dropped as he then turned an immediate serious tone and expression. "Really, though, Rin. What did you need?"_

_ My cheeks flushed a light scarlet before I asked, "Could you teach me to swim like you? No sound when you swim? Like a silent killer?"_

_ Katsuo immediately guffawed, "Bahahaha. Is that what you think of me? A silent killer? Hahaha! That's hilarious!"_

_ He was rolling on the floor, laughing his head off._

_ I deadpanned, "How _mature_, Katsuo . . ."_

_ "In any case," he suddenly became serious. "That is something I cannot teach you."_

_ My eyes widened, "Why not? Are you that selfish?"_

_ The moment I let those last words out, I immediately regretted them. Katsuo was the nicest person on earth. You could find absolutely no fault in him. He was literally . . . perfect._

_ He laughed, completely opposite to what I thought he would do, "Hahaha, no. I actually wish I could, but it's a family trait, I guess. I've tried teaching it to my cousins and even my other friends, but, alas, they couldn't do it either. The only other person I knew who could mimic me was my younger sister, but that was luck. I didn't even teach her. I believe that people who swim have to find their own identities—their own beliefs, selves, and such. Simply put, being you. If silence is who I am, and genius is you, be genius, which, in this case, is the best option of them all."_

_ Katsuo scrunched up the top of my head in a playful attitude. He was smiling jovially before finishing saying off his monologue, "Just be you, Rin."_

_End of Flashback_

"Just be you . . ." I trailed off, reiterating the words stated by Katsuo himself.

With that being said, the bell rang, signaling the dismissal of Gou and every other student who attended Iwatobi Upper School and snapping me out of my very own thoughts.

After a few more moments of waiting, Gou finally rushed out of the school's front double doors, dashing to my side almost immediately upon exiting the compound.

"Kya! Gomen, Rin! Did you wait too long?" my younger sister immediately apologized as she bowed down a good ninety degrees.

I sweat-dropped at her actions before standing upright and waving my hands in an "it's fine" motion.

"Gou, it's fine," I chuckled lightly. "Don't go around apologizing for something you didn't do wrong. How many times did I have to tell you this?"

She sighed before replying, "You're right, but I couldn't help myself."

There was a brief silence between us before Gou finished her speech, "So . . . shall we go home now?"

Once the sun began beaming full flight at the center of the sky, I replied . . . "Sure."


	3. Chapter Two: A Night Begotten

**Chapter Two**

**A Night Begotten**

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I closed the front door behind me. I was now in my simple gray sweatpants and long-sleeved maroon tee shirt with the words of "Takahashi Swim Team" written in bold white upon it.

It was now night and the stars sparkled like scattered glitter upon the darkness casted overhead. The air was chilly and crisp as leaves rustled about with the wind, moving gracefully like a blade of grass against a light breeze.

I sat down on the beige and slightly torn porch swing that hung by the side railing of the veranda and the ceiling roof above it. I brought my right leg up and wrapped my arms around it, clasping my left hand over my other wrist. My left leg hung loosely as I slowly swung the porch swing.

A cool breeze grazed my cheek as it suddenly felt as if I was in the Arctic, but only for a brief second . . . just . . . a brief second . . .

_Flashback_

_ An entire pile of leaves was thrown at me as my brother was laughing literally hysterically._

_ "Ugh, Katsuo," I grunted. "I hate you for all eternity. You now got leaves tangled in my hair."_

_ He was still guffawing, before speaking between his laughter, "You . . . look . . . like . . . Medusa!"_

_ At this point in time, he was on the floor laughing his head off._

_ I deadpanned, smacking my forehead with the palm of my hand, "You suck."_

_ He then turned his "puppy eyes" at me and I practically died._

_ "Aw," his hands then clasped together like in a prayer, as his puppy eyes were still apparent. "You don't mean that."_

_ I shuddered at his adorable actions, "Ugh, you are. Nothing's changing my mind, baka."_

_ "You're so cruel!" he cried 'tears' as he was on his knees, his hands still entwined._

_ I smacked my forehead with my wrist once again, "Oh, stop it, Katsuo."_

_End of Flashback_

I smiled faintly at the small memory of me and Katsuo before the facial expression soured and became a saddened one.

"Oh, Katuo," I exhaled a breath, attempting to contain my rising tears from falling once again. "Why did you have to die?"

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

_Pant. Pant. Pant._

My nightly jogs were a new addition to my daily routine as I aspired to fulfill the dream Katuo never had the chance to finish.

As I continued running, I glanced at the radiant stars cast overhead against the black curtain of darkness. The moon glistened against the trees and grass, coating them in a silvery veil.

Before long, I was too tired to continue and took a small break to have a sip of the cold water I brought with me and wipe the sweat off my brow with the small white towel that draped around my neck.

However, even _that_ couldn't keep my mind off the passing.

_Flashback_

_Ring._

_ Buzz._

_ Ring._

_ Buzz._

_ Ring._

_ Buzz._

_ After three rings and buzzes from my phone, I finally forced myself out of my sleep under the warm and toasty covers and reached for my phone by the nightstand._

_ I rubbed my eyes slightly with one hand before pressing the "Accept Call" button on the touchscreen—which was labeled with the caller's ID: Mikoshiba Seijuro—the captain of Samezuka Academy._

_ I replied drearily, "What do you want at this hour, man? It's . . ."_

_ I glanced at the digital clock at my nightstand._

_ "It's 2:49 A.M.," I deadpanned drowsily. "What could you possibly need from me? Reports? I already emailed them to you earlier."_

_ "N-no," Seijuro answered shakily._

_ By now, if not already, I was on full alert. Seijuro never stuttered no matter what time of day it was. Something was wrong. Really wrong. The feeling crept up my spine as I awaited the horrible news._

_ "What's wrong, Seijuro?" I nearly shouted over the phone as I jumped out of bed, revealing my black tank along with my three white-stripes at the side of my black sport slacks._

_ "H-he's dead," I heard him quiver as it sounded like Seijuro was shedding tears over the phone._

_ My eyes widened, now completely wide awake, "What! Who? Tell me! Now!"_

_ He didn't answer. He kept on sobbing._

_ "Seijuro! I swear! Tell me this instant! Who!" I shouted, almost screaming._

_ After a moment or two, he finally answered, shouting back at me, "Rin! It's Katsuo! He's gone! Dead!"_

_ At that, I felt a piece of me die inside as the phone, now forgotten, was dropped, clattered on the floor._

_End of Flashback_

Sitting on a stone bench, my back hunched. My hair shadowed my eyes as I closed the cap of my water container. I wiped my brow with my towel once again before standing up, jog in place, and then finally restart running around the city once again.

The streets were empty, and a slow, quiet breeze rustled past me as I was up running against it. The setting was perfect for me to clear my mind from all the stress I had contained inside me. Katsuo . . . Why did you have to leave?

I glanced nervously at the sky as I was panting. The cardio exercise was starting to get to me, and that was a problem. If Katsuo could run twenty kilometers a day—five in the morning, five at noon, five after school, and five at night—and he was not as physically able as I was, why couldn't I do the same?

I rolled up the sleeves of my long-sleeved t-shirt in an attempt for my sweat to evaporate the heat swelled up under the covers of my shirt.

Taking several deep breaths as I continued to run, another memory came past me although I was putting all my efforts . . . to keep them away.

_Flashback_

_Rin: Twelve Years Old_

_Katsuo: Thirteen Years Old_

_ "And the winner of today's fifty meter freestyle today is none other than Tsukuda Katsuo!" the announcer boomed through the speakers as Katsuo pumped his fist in the air in joy._

_ In the lane beside him, I pouted, saying, "You always win, Katsuo. Let someone else win for once!"_

_ "What's the fun in not trying your best, Rin?" Katsuo laughed. "It challenges me a lot."_

_ "But you always win," I whined as I drew in a sharp breath. "It's no fair to the rest of the population."_

_ "Hahaha!" Katsuo continued laughing. "I'd rather lose trying than win not, Rin."_

_ With that being said, he scrunched up my hair with his fist as he said so in a teasing manner._

_End of Flashback_

I ran another kilometer before almost passing out. By the time I reached the Samezuka dormitories, I was done with my list for that day . . . though it still wasn't as much as Katsuo completed day to day.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

A light breeze drifted past me as I, even at this time, was staring at the beautiful, radiant skies. The moon shone full and its glittering rays glistened the dew-filled grass, grounds, trees, plants, and flowers everywhere my eye touched until the horizon.

I glanced at my watch upon my wrist. It read 11:46. Fourteen minutes until midnight.

Fourteen minutes until the same exact time I found out about the death of my brother . . .

_Flashback_

_I was humming and drumming my fingers against the deep-beige wooden desk as I was completing my algebra homework. It was just like any ordinary day, but little did I know what would happen soon thereafter._

_ "La, da, di, dum, dum," I continued to hum the song as my fingers were tapping the rhythm._

_ Crash._

_ A loud thunder boomed from downstairs._

_ I immediately ripped the earplugs out of my ears, shut the laptop, and dashed down the stairs._

_ "Mother, are you all right?" I asked, full of concern, as I noticed the shattered screen of her slide cell phone in bits of glass upon the varnished wooden floor beside her._

_ She slowly turned towards me so that she was facing me. She was shaking violently._

_ I ran up to her and shook her shoulders before asking, "What's wrong? Why are you trembling? Mother, tell me! What's wrong?"_

_ She covered her mouth with her hand as her eyes widened before she managed to whisper, "He's gone."_

_ Her words were barely audible, but I replied as calmly as possible to keep the tense atmosphere in the room to a certain level, "Okay, Mother, who is gone?"_

_ Her lips quivered, and she didn't reply._

_ My gradual frustration started to pent up, but, before long, my mother breathed the words she had been meaning to say._

_ I let the information sink in as my hands lifted from her shoulders and fell down by my sides. My eyes widened as my breath was caught in my throat. A single tear then slid down my cheek before it descended to the floor._

_End of Flashback_

I closed my eyes to stop the tears from brimming over again.

"No more mourning," I swore to myself in a whisper. "Starting tomorrow, I'll go swimming again, take the normal route home, and visit Samezuka Academy like I used to again. And, if they'll let me, become their manager to live on the legacy of my brother."

With that being said, I stood up from the porch swing, opened the front door, entered, and returned upstairs to bed.


	4. Chapter Three: Music to My Ears

**Chapter Three**

**Music to My Ears**

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I leaned against the railing that stood before the window. It was currently pouring outside as the atmosphere in the school compound was damp as the myriad of students began rushing in the entrances from all the various corners of the school.

"Tsk," I grunted before I heard some stranger behind me say something I completely forgot.

"Oh, my gosh! Today's the day of the pep rally! The Samezuka boys will be coming!" she squealed with delight.

I deadpanned for me personally, not in a direct reaction to the stranger student. I stood up from the railing, free from its 'chain,' before I walked back to class, my backpack hanging loosely against my shoulders. The pack was light, as it was the first week of a new quarter of the school year.

I slid the sliding door of my classroom before dropping my bag to lean against the inner side of the metal leg of the desk. I slumped in my desk, an arm clutching under my chest, while the other was massaging my temple.

_Ding. Ding._

The bell rung, signaling the half-day of classes and the other half of festivity and pep rallies to increase whatever little 'spirit' remained within me.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

My hands were in the pockets of my black sport slacks, striped with three bands of white. I wore the white tee underneath my Samezuka swim team sports jacket. I stared out the window of one of the twenty buses that held the Samezuka students who all were to attend the Takahashi pep rally and festival. It was one of the few events in which the two sister schools collaborated together to create such an event. Of course, it made sense. These two schools were large compared to other private schools in Japan.

The ear-buds that stretched from my mp3 player were glued to both my ears as I listened to the somber music that always made me think so deeply about life . . . Its origins . . . and life in general. Would I ever get over the loss of my closest friend? Would I . . . ever find love?

_Little do you know_

_How I'm breaking while you fall asleep_

_Little do you know_

_I'm still haunted by the memories_

_Little do you know_

_I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece_

Katsuo . . . Why does the memories of you still haunt me? Why can't I find the missing puzzle piece to complete myself after that tragic loss?

_Little do you know_

_I need a little more time_

I just needed a little more time with you, man. You were my idol. You were my brother. You were my closest friend. I could console you with anything. Anything . . .

_Underneath it all, I'm held captive by the hole inside_

_I've been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind_

_I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight_

To forget you, Katsuo, my man . . . is impossible. It's just the loss of one friend . . . why does it impact me so much? Why did you leave this earth? This world? This universe? This dimension? Why? Why? Why? I can't get myself to forgive you for leaving. How can I forget all we've been through?

_Little do you know_

_I need a little more time_

I needed a little more time with you, Katsuo. I needed that shoulder to lean on. Where else could I find that in any other person?

_I'll wait, I'll wait_

_I love you like you've never felt the pain,_

_I'll wait_

_I promise you don't have to be afraid,_

_I'll wait_

_The love is here and here to stay_

_So lay your head on me_

Will I ever find love? You always taught me little tricks and knick-knacks to get girls to like me. I forgot almost half of them. Who else can I consult about my ice-cold love life? I want to love a girl who understands the pain I feel. I want a girl who I can lean on when I am feeling weak. I want a girl who will love me for all of eternity. I want a girl who can lean against me when she is down or downcast. Where are you when I need you the most?

_Little do you know_

_I know you're hurting while I'm sound asleep_

_Little do you know_

_All my mistakes are slowly drowning me_

_Little do you know_

_I'm trying to make it better piece by piece_

I want a girl who feels a connection . . . a link . . . between the two of us. We can feel the happiness, pain, sorrow, or even guilt of the other significant . . . I watched you die, Katsuo. I watched you go through heartbreak and tragedy with other girls. The one time I need someone to lean on with my personal problems . . . Where is the girl I am searching for?

_Little do you know_

_I love you 'til the sun dies_

Where is the girl I am searching for . . . until the sun dies?

_Oh wait, just wait_

_I love you like I've never felt the pain,_

_Just wait_

_I love you like I've never been afraid,_

_Just wait_

_Our love is here and here to stay_

_So lay your head on me_

I want the pain and sorrow to be gone. I want a girl to love and feel that love more than the pain and aches I feel inside. I want to love her more than whatever I've been afraid of. I want that love to be here and stay here. I want to lean on her as she will to me. I want to know her suffering, her pain, her happiness, her life . . . All about her . . . All of her . . .

_I'll wait, I'll wait_

_I love you like you've never felt the pain,_

_I'll wait_

_I promise you don't have to be afraid,_

_I'll wait_

_The love is here and here to stay_

_So lay your head on me_

_Lay your head on me_

_So lay your head on me_

Where are you? I want to lean on you like you can with me. A love that will stay with us forever—an eternity—a lifetime, and over so.

_'Cause little do you know_

_I love you 'til the sun dies . . ._

Wherever you are . . . I will love you . . . until the sun dies . . .

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I tucked the portable earphones into the slots of my two ears, and let the music take over me as the teacher droned on his lecture about the mathematical reviews I didn't need any more review of.

_I'll use you as a warning sign_

_That if you talk enough sense_

_That you'll lose your mind_

Someone to lean on . . . To get things straight . . . To make things . . . _right._

_I'll use you as a focal point_

_So I don't lose sight of what I want_

To be the swimmer my brother dreamt to be . . . I need someone to understand that my dream is to continue my brother's legacy. I need to find a direct path to the victory my brother dreamt of.

_I've moved farther than I thought I could_

_But I missed you more than I thought I would_

I got over Katsuo's death, but I still miss him. I shouldn't. I should move on . . . But how?

_I'll use you as a warning sign_

_That if you talk enough sense_

_That you'll lose your mind_

I need a warning sign. I need someone to talk some sense into before I lose my mind.

_I've found love where it wasn't supposed to be_

_Right in front of me_

_Talk some sense to me_

Will I ever find love? Someone I can lean on and pour all my worries and troubles to? Will I always be alone?

_I've found love where it wasn't supposed to be_

_Right in front of me_

_Talk some sense to me_

Love . . . Where can I find such thing? Is it even real? Is it just a fake reality people have made to become more confident? Confidence . . . Do I even have such attribute anymore?

_I'll use you as a makeshift gauge_

_Of how much to give and how much to take_

I need to measure the emotions flowing within me. I feel like a tsunami tormenting the lands within its vicinity. Will I ever become the soft, gentle waves that tenderly recede from the pure, beige sands of the beaches?

_I'll use you as a warning sign_

_That if you talk enough sense_

_That you'll lose your mind_

I need a warning sign. I need that someone. Will I ever meet him? I need to know. Will I ever meet him? Please, universe, say something.

_I've found love where it wasn't supposed to be_

_Right in front of me_

_Talk some sense to me_

Is it right in front of me? That so-called love? Am I alone in this world? Will anyone ever love the likes of me? Gloomy, somber . . . hurt.

_I've found love where it wasn't supposed to be_

_Right in front of me_

_Talk some sense to me_

Where is love? Right in front of me? I don't see it. Talk some sense to me . . .

_I've found love where it wasn't supposed to be_

_Right in front of me_

_Talk some sense to me_

When . . . Where . . . How . . .

A single tear slid down my cheek as I turned off my iPod and returned my attention to the teacher lecturing. I wiped the tear off my face and sat up straighter.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I felt someone nudge me, and I snapped out of my thoughts.

"Rin, we're almost there," one of my classmates sitting next to me informed me.

"Oh, thanks, man," I replied as smoothly as possible. I was a senior this year. I had to a prominent leader . . . and a prominent captain for my swim team.

"You okay?" my classmate raised an eyebrow. "You seem out of it today."

I covered my actual reasons by saying, "Just tired."

As I said so, I rubbed an eye to indicate that I was 'tired.'

"Well, you better be awake later because we're going to see the Takahashi girls," he armed me playfully.

I sighed quietly, not loud enough for him to hear, "Yeah."

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I wrote down the answer on the chalkboard to the math problem. Simple. Easy. Math in general was easy. You had the basic equation or the direct formula, and all you had to do was pluck the numbers in and solve. Life, however, was another subject. You could insert numbers anywhere, but it wouldn't solve your problems, or, at least, anywhere near it.

I exhaled quietly as I trudged back to my seat. Rain was still pouring as loudly as ever as I finally reached my seat and sat down gracefully and silently. It apparently wasn't ladylike to sit down with a sound—any type of sound, the swish of the uniform skirt, or anything.

_"Pardon for the interruption. Would Tsukuda Kiyomi please come up to the front office?"_ the announcer spoke through the microphone. The message reached throughout the entire school. "_Please drop your school items by your locker before heading to the office. Thank you."_

I looked at the teacher, and he gave me a curt nod, signaling that I could leave the classroom. After the signal was given, I stood up from my desk, packed the pencil case and notebook that lay on my desk for the class before exiting the door of the room.

I passed by classes quietly, going unnoticed, as I finally reached the locker rooms. I unlocked the lock and hung my backpack onto one of the hooks before slamming my locker door as quietly as possible.

I then passed by the bathroom, entered, and looked myself in the mirror. Whatever the office wanted me to do had to either be I did something wrong or something proper had to be in place . . . What not.

I straightened my skirt and blouse, untangled the few knots at the tips of my hair, and then finally took the chapstick from my skirt pocket and applied it on my lips before finally exiting the room.

I then walked over to the front office where, in the lobby, were a large mass of boys.

"Probably the Samezuka boys," I sighed mentally before opening the office door where I was met by the clerk.

"Hello, Tsukuda," she smiled at me lightly. "I was told that you were somewhat affiliated with Samezuka Academy family-wise or some sort, so I would like you to give them a tour of the school. The last stop should be the cafeteria. The auxiliary dorms should be given to them as they will be staying here for a week. As you know, this event is our fundraiser for the school's festivals, dances, and other galas. Do you mind? If you do, I can always find another person."

I drew in a sharp breath. It was true that I was somewhat affiliated with Samezuka Academy through my deceased brother. I couldn't turn down, though. That would be embarrassing. She acted kindly, and if I just turned her down like that . . . that wouldn't look good for my quiet and obedient reputation.

"I'll do it," I replied with a small, warm smile . . . just for the sake of kindness. "I don't think it's that much a hassle anyways."

She clasped her hands in glee, "Oh, Kami. Thank you so much! I'll leave it to you then. For the rest of the half-day of classes, you will be excused. Thank you very much. I know I can trust you with representing our school this year. Again, thank you so very much."

"No problem," I grimaced, though it was barely noticeable.

I then exited the front office after we both said good-bye to one another.

I looked at the mass of males in the front lobby. Boy, was this going to a hassle.

At an appropriate volume of loudness, I shouted over the myriad of voices that were all chattering, "Hello, my name is Tsukuda Kiyomi, but you can just call me Kiyomi. I will be your guide today for the tour around the school."

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

Because I was thanking the bus driver, I entered the Takahashi building after everyone else. I was on the last bus to enter Takahashi territory, so I knew I was going to miss out on some of the girl chatter, but it didn't matter that much to me.

As I entered the front lobby, I heard the beautiful voice of a girl.

" . . . but you can just call me Kiyomi. I will be your guide today for the tour around the school," she said.

I knew I missed the first part of her speech, but that wasn't the matter, aside from the fact I didn't know her family name. Kiyomi . . . such a beautiful name for a melodious-voiced girl. I tiptoed over the many heads before to catch a glimpse of her face.

Before long, I spotted her at the head of the crowd. She was beautiful. Flawless. Perfect. From her voice alone, I could catch several hints of pain and beauty. That voice . . . so familiar . . . yet so far away. So near . . . Yet so far . . .

It was _music to my ears_.


	5. Chapter Four: That Girl in the Clouds

**Chapter Four**

**That Girl in the Clouds**

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

At the back of the crowd, I tried to push myself up through the crowd to get nearer to her. There was something about her that made her . . . special . . . different . . . unique. She was _that girl_, and there was something about her that made me never want to let her go. I had to get nearer to her. That was the only way.

The air and everything around it was still damp and wet, including my hair, clothes, and skin.

My face stood grim as the words to the song I heard earlier still played through my head.

"Yo, Rin, stop pushing me!"

"Rin, my man, no need to rush!"

"Hey, you, stop it!"

Despite my peers' remarks, I kept pushing my way through the crowd until I was at the epicenter of the mass—halfway there.

I took a deep breath to catch my breath. I couldn't push my way through any further without angering my peers more, so I stayed where I was and listened to all around me.

"So this is the library," Kiyomi commented as we passed by a glass window, through it lied shelves upon shelves of books, textbooks, pamphlets, dictionaries, reference books, and so forth. "Here, students of Takahashi Academy gather to complete group projects, gather information for the personal increase of knowledge, read novels and so forth, or to write essays or other class assignments. Any questions thus far?"

"What's your number?"

"Want to go out with me some time?"

"We should absolutely hang out some time."

All these questions and remarks barely seemed to faze her as much as it did to me. Though it might not like much from the exterior, internally, I was livid—becoming scarlet with anger. However, Kiyomi didn't seem disorientated at all. She was monotone, showing absolutely no emotion in her voice. Not only that detail, but something about her was odd, not anything in a bad way, of course, but . . . rather, she sparked my interest, igniting whatever little flame I had for girls in a whole new light.

Because of the blitz of asserts and other comments regarding Kiyomi grew too out of hand and not school-appropriate, the male teachers of Samezuka immediately rushed from the bystands to stop the not school-appropriate remarks said by the students.

"Stop it, you all," Mr. Yamato stared at the lot of us sternly. "We are guests at this school. Stop all this nonsense at once."

We all nodded our heads and mumbled our adherences to Mr. Yamato before the tour of the school continued.

She muttered something inaudibly under her breath before she said at a louder volume, "Well, then. In any case, on with the tour . . ."

We strode down a few hallways, passing by several classes which were all still in session. Girls were gawking at us expectantly as if anyone of us were going to heed them any attention. My classmates might be interested in them, but I was intrigued in someone else. Kiyomi . . . that name suits her well.

She _was_ a 'pure beauty.' She _would_ be all I'd think about at night. She _will _be my lover forever. But, alas, this _could_ be all a dream.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I stared straight in front of me, zoning out the murmurs and voices the crowd behind me discussed. Sometimes, I just wanted to fall onto a cloud, back first . . . onto a soft, silk cushion . . . free from any worries . . . people . . . voices . . . pain . . . Free from it all.

I snapped out of my thoughts as I reared over to the auditorium.

"Here is the auditorium, where we hold our yearly school plays, concerts, and so forth," I noted aloud as the boys 'oohed' and 'ah-ed' at the female students re-enacting plays and so forth in the auditorium for drama class.

There on out, I showcased the chorus, band, and orchestra rooms; the math, literature, language, science, history, and electives hallway; and the main office, lecture hall, and so forth.

To me, it was a drag, but to the boys behind me, it was like their heaven—girls everywhere, short skirts, uniforms . . . yeah . . . all that 'good' stuff.

I sighed once we reached outside, where I was to supposedly show the male students their respective dorms. One thing was for sure, I was going against orders by not showing them the girls' dorms, but I didn't want them to stalk us in the middle of the night. No offense, mostly all guys were perverts and jerks.

The moment I passed by the dorms, the men behind me exclaimed in excitement, "Gosh! So this is our dorms we're staying at?! Heaven! Girls and nice dorms, food, and nice stuff!"

I deadpanned. Truth be told, these guys at Samezuka were more like girls and we girls at Takahashi were.

Walking over to one of the teachers nearest to me, I informed him of the following, "All of the dorms are presently unlocked. The keys to the rooms are in the respective rooms. Dinner will be served in the mess hall directly at 6. It will be in a fest like style, so casual attire is encouraged. No uniforms are necessary for today. Thank you for coming."

With that being said, I bowed.

"Thank you so much yourself, dear," the old sensei smiled in return. "I know these boys can become . . . _quite_ the hassle."

I sighed, before whispering in reply, "You bet. In any case, I have to get back to class, which is about to end, to discuss what I missed while being tour guide."

Then, I raised me voice to a louder extent to inform everyone in the room, "I'll be leaving you all to unpack and what-not. The room capacity set is two people per room. Dinner will be at six in the mess hall and casual attire is encouraged. Thank you very much for coming."

Noticing that I literally just repeated what I told the sensei to the students, I shook the thought off. As I tried to squish myself through the crowd, I noticed a maroon-hued zap of color pass by. The sensation when perceiving that color was so . . . _familiar._

In that moment, in that split second, in that smallest millisecond of seconds . . . I remembered.

_Flashback_

_Matsuoka Rin: Age 7_

_Tsukuda Kiyomi: Age 6_

_"You're too fast, Tsukuda!" a maroon-headed boy panted, as he halted where he would catch his breath._

_ The young girl dashing ahead of her friend looked behind her, sticking her tongue out as well as pulling on her eye to shove the statement in his face, "Hahaha! Slowpoke!"_

_ "Relax a little, will ya?" the boy fell down to the ground on his back—tired and exhausted._

_ Sand from the beach was scattered throughout his hair upon the sudden impact. What remained of the gold-orange sun and its radiant rays was shaped into a sphere—half of which was shaded with the glistening flaxen ocean, which reflected the gold color of the skies above while the other half was still revealed and full of bright intensity._

_ The girl jogged over to where he was and scrunched down beside him, chuckling, before saying something barely coherent, poking his chubby cheeks in the process, "Hehehe . . . Katsuo's up ahead, and if we don't catch up to him, who will, eh, Rin?"_

_ Her close-eye smile directed at him made the poor boy blush a deep crimson, "Sh-shut up."_

_ "Ooh!" the little girl 'oohed.' "Someone's blushing! Hurry up, you slowpoke, or else I'm leaving without you. Katsuo's gonna leave us behind!"_

_ With that being said, the girl stood up from her scrunched up position and then rushed to catch up with her brother._

_ A moment thereafter, the boy managed to catch his breath, stood up, and dashed after the girl and her brother himself. A smile . . . was plastered on his face._

_End of Flashback_

_Flashback_

_Matsuoka Rin: Age 9_

_Tsukuda Kiyomi: Age 8_

_ I looked at the stars scattered across a meadow of darkness. It was the blanket of pitch-black that covered the Earth as she slept. I was under that blanket—warm and feeling safe as ever._

_ Someone was trailing behind me, tiptoeing as if to sneak upon me, and attack._

_ I sighed, taking in a breath and exhaling a breath, before saying, "I know you're there, Rin."_

_ The said boy snapped in fingers in frustration, "Aw, dang it! I thought I could sneak up on you again!"_

_ I laughed, "Hehehe, good luck with that, Rin-rin!"_

_ "Pft, it's just 'Rin,' Kiyomi-chan," he whined. "Not Rin-rin."_

_ The girl laughed, "Meh, whatever! I like Rin-rin, best!"_

_ He deadpanned in annoyance, "Kiyomi . . ."_

_End of Flashback_

I looked away from Rin immediately. I was the tour guide. He didn't bother to come up near to me. He probably forgot who I was. He went to different elementary and intermediate school than I did. He left Japan for Australia. I saw him once at the funeral. I waved to him, but he didn't bother waving back. He forgot about me. At least, I was pretty sure he did.

With that in mind, I immediately left the scene.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I watched as the girl named Kiyomi departed from the building. Her name was so familiar, yet it didn't ring a bell. What was it that made her different? What was it that made her feel and sound so familiar?

"Go on, boys," one of the teachers pushed up his glasses as he said so. "Pair up and go into your rooms. If you have any trouble, come to us, but if _you_ cause any trouble, you will be disciplined. Understood? I believe that about covers the basic rules as of today.

"We will gather in the lobby of this dorm when its time to go at 5:45, understood?" another sensei instructed us.

"Yes, sir!" we all shouted at once as he dismissed us to our rooms.

I paired up with Nitori as we were closer as friends than anyone else I knew in the school, as Seijuro left for college already.

I took one last glimpse in the direction Kiyomi left, reminiscing her presence and how it felt so familiar, before entering my temporary dorm to unpack.

She was that girl . . . That girl in my daydreams . . . _That girl in the clouds._


	6. Chapter Five: Grays in Black and White

**Chapter Five**

**The Grays in Black and White**

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

Resting the back of my hand against my forehead, I let my thoughts course free throughout my mind. A girl, so far, yet so near. Why was she constantly in my mind? She was just one mere person. She shouldn't have been so . . . so . . . _close in my mind._ What were these feelings I were feeling internally? Why were they even there?

I placed my earphones at my ear and played soft, moving piano music. I rubbed my forehead in an attempt to soothe my headache. I didn't even know her family name. She felt so . . . familiar.

"_Familiar . . ."_

"Yo, Rin!" Nitori called my name loudly.

I sighed. I couldn't get a moment of peace in my life, now could I?

"Yes?" I replied unwantingly.

"It's time for dinner!" he jumped up and down excitedly. "All the girls from Takahashi Academy are going to be there!"

I rose with a start. If all the girls from Takahashi Academy were going to be present at dinner, then that must mean that . . . _she_ would be there.

I quickly grabbed my coat and put it on while I ran down the halls to the main lobby of the guest dorms. My burgundy hair was frilly and messy, but that was beside the point. I was going to meet her again, and I was not going to let that chance slip by.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I sighed as I skimmed through the selection of books in the library. Nothing interesting was there anymore. Every single good book had already been zipped through and read to the core. There were a few books about airplanes, but they were so factual, they didn't really interest me.

Aisle through aisle, I slid past through in search of a miraculous book I could call 'mine.'

_"Dinner will be served in the mess hall in five minutes,"_ the intercom sounded in a graceful tone. "_Students should now all be entering the mess hall for dinner unless otherwise granted permission by an administrator."_

I lightly bumped my head against the bookshelf I was leaning on. I didn't have much more time to find and check out a good book to read. I drew in another breath before shuffling my feet towards one of the librarians to ask if I could stay a little longer.

"Would you mind if I stay another ten minutes here in the library?" I asked her. "I would really like to find another good book to read tonight after my homework and such."

The woman in about her fifties smiled at me, "Of course, but do remember that dinner will already be served by then."

"Of course, I don't want to keep you from dinner, so are you sure it's alright?" I asked once again to ensure that she wouldn't be skipping out on the early parts of dinner break as well.

She waved it off, "It's fine. It's _you_ whom I am worried about. I simply do not want to keep yourself from dinner."

I smiled at her before saying, "Thank you very much."

I gave her a slight bow before speed-walking past the various shelves in teen fiction. This week, instead of the scientific and mathematical books I was reading during the previous week, I decided to read a romantic teen fiction book. Romance wasn't really my thing, though I wouldn't mind to have a little more hindsight into the latter. A girl should be adept in all aspects of life—education, life, love, and dreams. That sounded quite dumb, but that wasn't the matter at hand. The matter at hand now was finding a good romantic book to read for the day, and I must say that it was difficult.

I didn't exactly want a helpless adult woman who couldn't do anything get saved by a handsome, young and attractive prince. No, that was _way_ to mainstream—too princess-y. I wanted a novel where a decent girl fell in love with her best friend or maybe even a studious girl falling in love with a bad boy, I wouldn't mind that either, just as long as it wasn't that the girl was as helpless as a rag doll.

I scanned the shelves, picking out books one by one and zipping through their summaries that were buried under their covers. I found some novels too short and others tagged too 'princess-y.' There was no legitimate Japanese novel I could ever find decent, well, aside from the manga, but plain books themselves had their own meaning to things. Manga had their pictures, describing the scene in their own epic and universal manner. Books, on the other hand, had their way of explaining scenes, backgrounds, and people in their own ways as well—each word compensating a new and vigorous aspect of each and every little detail imaginable. That was what I admired about authors. They could describe anything they wanted in the _way_ that they wanted. It was like describing a dream of their dreams.

I chuckled to myself. I was getting too carried away.

After minutes upon minutes of searching for a good book to delve in for the night, I finally came across one that sparked my interest. It was about an extremely smart girl, in high school, who had never fallen in love. However, one day, she met a young man who was not only ingenious, he was popular and got the highest grades in the entire history of the school. He was a prodigy in not only academics, but in sports as well. Let's just say that I have a thing for bishonen.

I then brought the book to the librarian, who gave me a light smile.

"Finally found what you were looking for?" she asked as she checked out the book for me. "What is your student ID?"

"Yes, and it's 1636215," I responded with a smile as well, returning the kind gesture.

"Thanks for visiting the library," she gave me another warm smile before I exited the library, my stomach growling at me for some sustenance, and to the mess hall to shush my angering appetite.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

In line to get my dinner, I passed by the rows of food, scooping up a dish here and there onto my plate. Before long, my plate was full enough to fill my stomach. I had a side of jasmine rice, a side of grilled salmon, a side of asparagus, a side of tuna sushi, and a glass of water, before I sat down beside Nitori at the center of the hall.

I scanned about the room before eating the food on my plate. She wasn't anywhere to be found. I sighed once again. This mess hall was too crowded for words to even describe.

"Are you looking for somebody?" Nitori asked beside me, arching an eyebrow.

"No," I replied simply before sitting down and taking a bite of my food.

"You sure?" he questioned again.

"Yeah, I'm sure," I replied, though I knew it was a lie.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I entered the mess hall with my book in hand. I rushed to get a plate at the end of the dinner line and selected myself a few sides from the dishes offered. After selecting a side of grilled salmon sushi, some brown rice, and a side of marinated spinach, I sat down at an edge of the mess hall and began eating as I read the novel I just received from the library.

Since we weren't exactly assigned any homework given the fact that the Samezuka boys were invited for the time being.

After another minute of pondering and filling my grumbling stomach, I began delving into the contents of the novel. The summary of the book was not the only thing that sparked my interest, it was also the title—_Sometimes. _ There were endless possibilities for a title entitled so. Think about it, sometimes love will overcome you, and sometimes it won't. It's simply the life cycle that is taken in place that counts.

I heard someone sit next to me, but I ignored whoever it was, instead starting to read the preface of the story.

_Preface_

_ I never thought I would ever fall in love. Maybe it was that everyone thought I was so cold and serious. Maybe it was the fact that I was too absorbed into my studies to even noticed whether or not someone even liked me. But, sometimes, you've just got to take a breather from life, not think about others or what your parents expect from you, and breathe. It's that sometime where you have to think about yourself—selfish but not too selfish. And it's sometimes . . . that I wish I were more absorbed into the outside world than that of the inner. Just . . . sometimes._

I must admit. It wasn't a shabby preface. In fact, it actually intrigued me much more than I thought it would. I re-read the paragraph once more to have a deeper feel for the topic.

However, midway through the book, I heard the person who was sitting beside me ask, "So what's your name?"

I glanced at the person residing next to me. I drew in a breath. Rin.

Acting casually as if I didn't know who he was, I answered his question, "You can call me Kiyomi."

He arched an eyebrow, "Weren't you the guide for Samezuka today?"

I nodded my head hesitantly, "Yeah . . . I was."

"Name's Rin," he extended his hand for me to shake.

"Nice to meet you," I replied shortly shaking his hand.

Our hands were intertwined longer than it should have, and our gazes were locked against each other. After a moment of doing so, we let go, and I tore away from his gaze and onto my food, taking another bite out of my spinach.

An awkward silence resided between us, as it was then that I knew that he _definitely _forgot who I was.

I didn't make any attempt to resume our lost conversation, and, though he looked like he wanted to resume so, he seemed like he didn't know how, so I filled that gap for him.

"So . . . did you need something?" I asked him warily, before mentally knocking myself out for the weird phrasing of the question. Really, that sounded as if I didn't want him next to me.

He exhaled a breath, "Truth be told . . . You look very familiar, but I can't put my finger on how."

I chuckled, "You do to me too."

However, there was a difference. He didn't know who I was, but _I_, on the other hand, knew him.

"Do you swim?" he asked me, before he noticed my sudden jolt, confirming his question. "So you do."

"Yeah," I answered. "I do."

Rin put a fist in his hair, rubbing his scalp in annoyance as he couldn't figure it out.

"Your food's getting cold," I pointed out to him as I continued to eat my plate.

"Thanks," he replied before he took another mouthful of his sushi.

I looked the opposite direction from him and smiled. He had no idea at all.

"Say, do you swim competitively?" he asked me another question.

"Yeah, I do," I replied simply.

"Do you know who I am, then?" he asked me another question yet again. "Because I have this gut feeling that you do."

I contained my uprising smile. He was more talkative to me than I saw him with any other person, well, maybe not my brother.

I finished the last bits of my plate, chewed, and swallowed, before answering, "Yeah, I know."

He arched an eyebrow, "Do tell me."

I rose up from my seat before saying, "Deep down, I think you know."

He bit his bottom lip in frustration, "A hint, then."

Picking up my tray and the plate to place away in its proper place, I gave him the hint he wanted, "Bye, Rin-Rin."

Before he could say anything else, I quickly absorbed myself through the mass of people lined up to put their plates away, but I knew that hint was enough for him to realize who I was—enough to fill the shady grays in the definitive black and whites.


	7. Chapter Six: Remembering

**Chapter Six**

**Remembering**

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

_Rin put a fist in his hair, rubbing his scalp in annoyance as he couldn't figure it out._

_ "Your food's getting cold," I pointed out to him as I continued to eat my plate._

_ "Thanks," he replied before he took another mouthful of his sushi._

_ I looked the opposite direction from him and smiled. He had no idea at all._

_ "Say, do you swim competitively?" he asked me another question._

_ "Yeah, I do," I replied simply, turning my head back to him._

_ "Do you know who I am, then?" he asked me another question yet again. "Because I have this gut feeling that you do."_

_ I contained my uprising smile. He was more talkative to me than I saw him with any other person, well, maybe not my brother._

_ I finished the last bits of my plate, chewed, and swallowed, before answering, "Yeah, I know."_

_ He arched an eyebrow, "Do tell me."_

_ I rose up from my seat before saying, "Deep down, I think you know."_

_ He bit his bottom lip in frustration, "A hint, then."_

_ Picking up my tray and the plate to place away in its proper place, I gave him the hint he wanted, "Bye, Rin-Rin."_

_ Before he could say anything else, I quickly absorbed myself through the mass of people lined up to put their plates away, but I knew that hint was enough for him to realize who I was—enough to fill the shady grays in the definitive black and whites._

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

The nickname shot me like a bullet. I knew her. I truly did. I never thought I'd forget her, but I did. Never would I ever believe that I would . . . forget . . . to remember someone like her—someone so important to me.

_Flashback_

_Matsuoka Rin: Age 9_

_Tsukuda Kiyomi: Age 8_

_ I looked at the stars scattered across a meadow of darkness. It was the blanket of pitch-black that covered the Earth as she slept. I was under that blanket—warm and feeling safe as ever._

_ Someone was trailing behind me, tiptoeing as if to sneak upon me, and attack._

_ I sighed, taking in a breath and exhaling a breath, before saying, "I know you're there, Rin."_

_ The said boy snapped in fingers in frustration, "Aw, dang it! I thought I could sneak up on you again!"_

_ I laughed, "Hehehe, good luck with that, Rin-rin!"_

_ "Pft, it's just 'Rin,' Kiyomi-chan," he whined at the nickname. "Not Rin-rin."_

_ The girl laughed, "Meh, whatever! I like Rin-rin, best!"_

_ He deadpanned in annoyance, "Kiyomi . . ."_

_End of Flashback_

I sat at the dinner table with a blank stare plastered across my face—an empty look in my eyes. The constant chatter around me simmered down as if the world came to a standstill. The colors around me faded to nothing more than that of black and white. The only color that remained was the imaginative figure of Kiyomi in my mind.

I snapped my eyes wide open. The noises of both the Samezuka boys and Takahashi girls grew louder and louder little by little. The vibrant colors around me started to illuminate to a sharper to a more vivid view.

The spoon full of now cold jasmine rice lay limply in my hand. Before long, another shock wave of flashbacks crumbled me to the ground once.

_Flashback_

_Matsuoka Rin: Age 10_

_Tsukuda Kiyomi: Age 9_

_ I watched as Kiyomi dashed before me, attempting fairly well to outrun me. We were playing tag, and, never once before, had I ever managed to catch her. Likewise, whenever she was 'it,' she never caught me either. We were equals, neither of us gaining any advantages over the other. Our swim times were the same. Our mile times were the same. Our push-up numbers were the same. Our sit-up numbers were the same. Why, even our "how many Yamato mini sushi rolls can you eat" number was the same—35._

_ However, that all changed on that one, fateful day. Though it seemed like any other ordinary day, it changed our lives forever._

_ I sprinted faster and faster towards Kiyomi, barely an inch away from her to tag successfully. I bit my lip as she noticed my advance and ran faster and faster away from me._

_ Increasing my speed as well, my brain sent nerve signals to my legs, ordering them to run faster and faster, though they, never could in my wildest dreams, physically could. But, they did._

_ I tripped my way towards Kiyomi before I tagged her, tackling her to the ground._

_ My eyes widened as I realized that I had tagged her. I tagged her . . . I did it! I beat our neck and neck score of infinity._

_ I mentally thanked my brain and trippy legs before saying to Kiyomi, "Sorry, I fell over you."_

_ She shrugged the matter off, "It's no biggie." The edges of her mouth curved into a smile, "But you finally beat me! Never thought you had it in you, Rin-rin!"_

_ I smiled along with her, saying, "I tripped, so I guess tripping can have its advantages."_

_End of Flashback_

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

Once I put away my food tray in the appropriate stack of trays, I scurried back to my locker, where I took my school bag out and packed what I needed for the night, including my new book.

Unlike the other girls at Takahashi Academy, I didn't live at the dorms. Instead, I lived with my parents, who, though hid it fairly well, were still grieving the loss of my brother.

I sighed at the thought of Katsuo and his various deeds for, not only my family, but for our neighbors and his classmates, teachers, coaches, and sports teammates as well.

He would always help others in need. No matter what it was. He would do it. Ask him a question about academics, and he'd answer it in a snap with no hesitation and no second thoughts. He was quick and avid; strong and muscular, smart and clever. In other words, he was the utter essence of perfection, and for that, I admired him the most for that.

Katsuo was the perfect child in our family and relatives. He never caused trouble. He never partied behind my parents back, and the only time he lied was to protect his loved ones.

I snickered as I remembered when he would tell his friends that he was sick. This was about a year before he . . . well, died. In any case, he would tell his friends that he was sick, but, actually, he went to play basketball, coach me swimming, or just hang out with me. Let's just say he as perfect a brother could ever get.

But, thing was, he was perfect—the essence of unparalleled genius. I could never ever catch up to him. Ever, but, he was always happy, and that's what made me happy. I could never get jealous of him at all because he was always there for me, protected me, laughed with me (or at me) . . . He . . . just was . . . the best.

With that in mind, I zipped my bag closed before dashing out of the Takahashi school grounds, where, not only could I keep Katsuo in mind, but also so Rin wouldn't be able to catch me for the . . . 'details.'

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I shoved the rest of my food on my tray down my throat, before shuffling my feet to place the plastic tray on the 'return' stack, and rushing out of the mess hall.

_"Did she leave yet? Did she stay in the dorms at Takahashi? Or does she go back home after school's out?"_ my thoughts raced furiously.

My feet, anxious to go, scuffed disarray, not knowing where to go. My sense of direction was disheveled—completely in shambles. Where could she have gone?

There were endless of possibilities on where she could have gone, yet I didn't have a clue onto where in the least.

I glimpsed a pair of girls chattering endlessly down the hallway, leaning against the metal rails of the school's hallway.

Walking briskly over to them, I asked, "Do you know who Tsukuda Kiyomi is?"

The name of the girl ever so interesting escaped my lips, rendering a soft edge in my voice that was unneeded. I sounded as if I was _desperate_ for her, in which, I was, in a sense, but not in a romantic manner.

One of the two girls replied after she and her friends exchanged glances, "Um, yeah. Why ask?"

I inhaled deeply, holding in the breath momentarily, before replying, "Personal, but do you know where she is?"

Again, the two friends exchanged glances before the other girl spoke, "She probably left for home by now."

"But that's all we'll say," the other girl added, before grabbing her friend and dashing back to the mess hall, slightly scared at my demeaning attitude.

I sighed in defeat, rubbing my forehead in tacit frustration. It looked as if she didn't want to be near me, but I, on the other hand, did. This was going to be a feat.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I walked back home, string earphones in my ears, listening softly to melancholy music.

_Sometimes you fall down_

_Never get back up_

_Sometimes you jump high_

_But end up crashing down_

_Sometimes you just know_

_When you are disheartened_

_Sometimes skies just cry_

_To let go their feelings_

_You just got to try_

_To get back on your feet_

Sighing, I dragged my feet back home, but, on my way back, an unanticipated ripple of memories came flashing back.

_Flashback_

_Matsuoka Rin: Age 10_

_Tsukuda Kiyomi: Age 9_

_ I ran ahead of Rin, hilariously trying to outrun the 'it.' We were playing tag, and, never once before, had Rin ever managed to catch me. Likewise, whenever I was 'it,' I never caught him either. We were equals, neither of us gaining any advantages over the other. Our swim times were the same. Our mile times were the same. Our push-up numbers were the same. Our sit-up numbers were the same. Why, even our "how many Yamato mini sushi rolls can you eat" number was the same—35._

_ However, that all changed on that one, fateful day. Though it seemed like any other ordinary day, it changed our lives forever._

_ I sprinted faster and faster away from Rin as he sped up his pace, him now being barely an inch away from me to tag me successfully. I noticed Rin's advancement and then began increasing my speed._

_ However, I felt as if Rin was running faster and faster than his usual 'fastest' time. It was as if he was, all of a sudden, a player in a video game, that, after increasing levels, he also increased with quicker agility, defense, and attack skills. But, this was Rin we were talking about here. He wasn't a player in a game. He was Rin, my equal, and he was suddenly becoming better than me._

_ From the corner of my eye, I glanced at Rin to only see him trip his way towards me before he actually tagged me, tackling me to the ground._

_ His eyes widened as he realized that he had tagged me._

_ "Rin tagged me," I whispered to myself mentally. "We were equals and now he's better."_

_ I noticed Rin ponder over something before apologizing, "Sorry, I fell over you."_

_ I shrugged the matter off, "It's no biggie." I forced the edges of my mouth to curve into a smile, "But you finally beat me! Never thought you had it in you, Rin-rin!"_

_ As I said those words, I mentally kicked myself in the gut. He beat me . . . I knew this day would come, but not so soon . . . In fact, I didn't think I had anticipated this happening at all. I thought we would always be equals—the same forever._

_ He smiled along with me, saying, "I tripped, so I guess tripping can have its advantages."_

_ We both laughed at how he finally tagged me, but, internally, I was breaking down . . . because I knew. I knew that, from that moment on, he would just be getting better and better, eventually surpassing me beyond an infinity._

_End of Flashback_


	8. Chapter 7: The Difference Between

**Chapter Seven**

**The Difference Between 'To Know" and "To Understand"**

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

I tugged my knee-high navy socks on before adjusting my cardigan so that it fit the way I wanted it to. I then took the frames of my hair and centered them towards the back center of my head before clipping a hair accessory to keep the strands together. Flipping my wrist so that the watch would be visible, I glanced at the time to see that there was there was fifteen minutes left before the half-day classes would begin and the bonding time between the Samezuka boys and Takahashi girls would commence.

Sighing, I began wondering whether or not the teachers and faculty here at Takahashi Academy actually _wanted_ us to promote young dating and other reckless activities. It was a waste of time for such a young age. The misconceived idealism of "love" and so-called "romance" was nothing more than an illusion during high school. Yes, of course, there was such thing as I love, I know, but "dating" should wait until after college and after he or she finds a stable job to support him and his family. Seriously, nowadays, people take the concept of "love" and "dating" much too lightly. There were rarely such thing as "gentlemen" nowadays because of it. We were teenagers. Backstabbing, reckless, idiotic, and ruthless adolescents. Tsk, I am basically insulting myself as well, aren't I? With me still being an adolescent and all. Ahem.

I lightly skipped down the staircases and down the main floor before sweeping past the dormitories and outside gardens to the main building, where all the studying, learning, et cetera, took place. As it was still quite early in the morning, some groans from the fellow students at Takahashi began to groan and yawn, tired from all the studying (or partying, considering the guys were still here). At Takahashi, there were no such thing as weekends. There was school everyday no matter what. Sunday morning had a two-hour delay for students committed to religious purposes, such as going to the temple, praying for loved ones at their respective graves, or going to church.

Today was Saturday, and though in other foreign countries got a break day, we didn't. We were, quote quote, "elites." We were girls who were devoted to make an impression against society whether it would be in technology, life sciences, mathematics, literature, foreign languages, sports, and so forth. We had to somehow impact society. In other words, we had to dedicate ourselves to a certain cause in order to be accepted into Takahashi Academy. Not only did we have to dedicate ourselves to a cause, we also had to be loyal _to_ that very cause, receive excelling academic marks in all classes, and take electives to further benefit our cause.

Many of my classmates dedicated themselves to ice skating, mathematics, biology, scientific researches, tennis, volleyball, acting, writing, and so forth. But me? I was a reckless first year, ready to tackle on anything when I applied for Takahashi Academy. I wanted to swim. Do nothing but swim. I was the rookie ace of the swim team at the school—nothing more and nothing less. I was _known _throughout the entire city for my ability, even reaching the ears of some news reporters and recruiting officers for colleges. But, that all changed when my brother died, but there was still no changing it. I faked I tore several muscles in my upper arms and torso, calling the sports quits, but deep down, I knew I would and _had_ to return to the 'field' of endless, swirling pools of crystalline waters. The swimmer's favorite aroma of chlorine was his or her perfume. It was our calling, and that was when, in that very hallway before my math class, that I realized that the pool was calling to me to make amends and to return to where I called my second home not so long ago.

"_Tonight,"_ I told myself mentally. "_Tonight, I will go down to the pool and swim and improve and be better. That ought to make Katsuo happy as well. It was my cause, after all."_

With that gracious, compelling thought in mind, I gave myself a small smile before entering the classroom, as class would start in only a mere more minutes.

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

I yawned as I ran my fingers through my maroon hair. Since we would be staying at Takahashi for a few more days, our classes (thank Kami it would only be for a half-day) were held outside in the gardens on varnished wooden benches and tables. It was a typical girl's fairytale. Birds chirping melodies ever so "compelling" to the ear, and butterflies flitting about and about everywhere amongst the violets, hyacinths, and cherry blossoms.

_"Seriously. Is this a nightmare? Can I somehow snap myself out of it?"_ I thought.

The teacher then clapped his hands to catch our attention on "such a _fine_ morning," quoting the teacher from the beginning of class.

"Now, turn to your partner and memorize five of the ten haikus I handed out to you in half an hour before I begin testing you all on your memory skills," the sensei smiled cheekily. "It's a good assessment to have for those who are not worthy of being in this honors class. If you are not able to memorize five of them in half an hour, you are bumped to the regular classes. Now please do begin studying."

I slumped my head against the table to find Nitori deadpanning nervously at my actions.

"Rin-san," he called me. "You should try starting to memorize, and we could help each other in the process."

I grunted before finally sighing, "Tsk, yeah, that's probably a good idea. How about we start looking at which haikus we want to do and then we individually start memorizing and then test each other afterwards. Does that sound alright with you?"

"Yes, sir!" he clasped his hands together happily before diligently returning to his work.

I deadpanned at Nitori's actions before finally resting my head against my slumped arm and began studying the first five haikus my eyes came across.

_Swift as a river_

_Slow as the eagle in flight_

_Force of a typhoon_

I began muttering the words to myself over and over again and again upon repeat upon repeat. After several minutes of doing that, I looked away from the slip of paper and began reciting the haiku from memory. Seeing that the first time from memory was quite fluent, but still had some errors, I reviewed the poem once again before looking away and reciting it once more from memory. The second time reciting the words was flawless, and then I continued to the next one.

_The clock is ticking_

_The leaves are waving away_

_Time is slipping so_

I repeated the same process to only find that there were still some errors with my memorization method. I read the haiku once again several times before looking away, before finally memorizing the poem. I was now onto the next.

_Water slides past rock_

_It cleans and toils the boulder_

_Splints begin to fade_

I again began memorizing the haiku before moving onto the fourth one.

_Fire cleanses the soul_

_Impurities are now gone_

_But the sin still stays_

The process began yet again before finally resting on the final one—one I was least expecting.

_Love is illusion_

_Love breaks, shatters, and fades gone_

_Yet it still remains_

The haiku reminded me Katsuo, though the love I felt for him was never romantic, but that of a brotherly love. He was the brother I never had. He was the brother who helped me throughout my life. He was the rope I clung on so desperately. But, one day, the rope snapped. The remaining frayed threads of the rope caught another lifeline. Kiyomi.

She was "Love." She was my illusion of love, yes, but also my reality. Katsuo broke, shattered, and erased everything I thought would be fine and perfect, but his love still remained, but through his sister. I knew that now. I realized that now. I realized the importance of the haikus given today for us third years to memorize. It was a boost to those who had been broken.

From that moment on, I knew. I just _knew_. The gut feeling trapped between my illusions of a perfect reality obliterated all evil and impurities from my soul. From now on, I would be swift as a coursing river, slow as the eagle in full flight, and . . . break past all records with the force of a great typhoon.

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

The moment all classes ended for the day, I zipped past all the students in the building and rushed to the temporary dormitory, for students who lived at home, to lounge. I wanted to finish my homework before the "games," so you called it, against the Samezuka boys would commence. Literally, the whole perception of the damned "games" was like the "Battle of the Sexes."

Chemistry, Physics, Math, Literature. I zoomed past chemical equations, velocity problems, linear equations, and essays for three hours before the loudspeaker came on—loud and boisterous as ever.

_"Would all Takashi and Samezuka students please report to the main lobby in the main building," _the speaker announced. "_Repeat. Would all Takahashi and Samezuka students please report to the main lobby in the main building."_

Sighing, I then proceeded to pack up my stacks of paper, textbooks, and so forth into their appropriate bins before quickly changing into a pair of cropped skinny jeans, navy tee, and sneakers, grabbing my black hoodie on the way out.

The Samezuka vs. Takahashi "games" were always casual, meaning that no uniforms were necessary. It was sort of tacit, though there were posters on bulletins all over the school concerning the matter. Either way, it was kind of a short break before mid-quarter examinations began.

Girls all over the dorms turned left and right to the main lobby, eventually merging with the boys from the guest dorm.

Questions were tossed all over the hallways and rooms.

"What are we going to do?"

"Isn't Matsuoka Rin _so_ dreamy?"

"Oh, my gosh. Did you hear that _Naruto_ ended?"

"I love this American T.V. show called _Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.; _do you know where to find it online?"

"Some people say we're running laps in some of the games. Ugh, is that true?"

I sighed. The volume of the atmosphere was way too much.

I shoved my hands into the center pocket of my hoodie as I continued walking through the masses of crowds.

Students upon students began sifting through the various hallways of the main building and then began filing into the main lobby. Simply put, it was crowded. Every single available seat was taken until no more remained. Some people resorted to sitting in the isles, while other preferred to stand in the back. It was hectic.

A few teachers from both respective schools were sitting in chair on the stage as the student presidents of both schools were standing aside each other at the podium, getting ready to commence whatever activity was next—the Games.

Since I was pushed back from the crowd so much, I had to resort standing in the back, where a certain familiar maroon-haired boy was only a few meters away from me. I ducked my head a little lower before lightly tucking my hoodie's cap over my head. It didn't shield my eyes or face, but rather resided at the center of my head. It was the least I could do to somewhat shield my identity . . . kind of.

_"Hello, everyone," _the representative of Takahashi spoke fluidly into the podium's microphone. _"We have gathered here today to commemorate the annual Takahashi vs. Samezuka stand off."_

A series of shouts and applause followed. Some people from each respective school were booing the other, while some just clapped their hands and stayed quiet.

"_First off, there will be an M&M war, one of the highlights of the event. Second will be Simon Says. Don't laugh. It may seem easy, but, as we all know, following instructions isn't, for many of us, a forte,"_ the student representative spoke. "_But then again, there _are_ some of you who are athletically-excelling. Hence, why we will have a Jeopardy section for those academically-excelling."_

_ "Those are the three courses we will be holding today_," the male representative then informed us. "_Would Rows one to four please . . ."_

I zoned out as I watched the rows began to disperse, following the directions of the student government reps. Still in a daze, I readjusted my hair into a relatively messy high ponytail, and failed to notice someone approach me.

"You left the other day," a certain purple-headed boy stated the obvious, his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Indeed I did," I replied evenly, still adjusting my ponytail.

"Why did you say anything that you were Katsuo's sister?" he asked me, breathing raggedly in both curiosity and frustration. "We were best friends."

"Emphasis on '_were,'"_ I muttered through clenched teeth as my hair-tie was placed between my jaws.

My hands roamed the ends of my hair to tie it neatly into the high ponytail as I planned.

He shook his head full of doubt, "That doesn't change the fact that we are friends, and that, in the past, we were _really_ good friends."

I sighed, "That was then, and this is now, Rin-rin."

"Yet you still call me by that nickname," he arched an eyebrow with a smug smile plastered across his face. "Neh, Kiyomi."

I stared at him blankly before ripping out my hair-tie from between my teeth and then proceeded to tie my hair up neatly.

"You still swim, then?" he asked me. "Competitively?"

I shrugged, "You already asked me this question yesterday."

Rin sighed in frustration, "Then I certainly don't think you'd mind answering it again."

I relented, "Yes . . . to both questions."

He smiled, "That's nice to know."

"I quit for a short hiatus, though," I pursed my lips, hesitant to reveal any other information about myself to my former best friend. It was awkward, so to speak. To touch base, I barely knew him anymore. It had been years since I last met him in person to talk in an actual conversation. It was just . . . outright . . . _weird._

"How come?" he questioned. "You don't seem like the type to quit, even for a little bit."

I gave him a small laugh, "I think you know the answer to that question, Rin-rin."

**Matsuoka Rin's Point of View**

Deep down, I knew the reason, for it was the reason I so deemed to force upon myself as well—Katsuo. But I realized that I couldn't dwell on the past forever. I had to move on. That was today, and I wanted Kiyomi to move along with me.

"You know you shouldn't dwell on the past, right?" I commented.

She gave me a small laugh. It was music to my ears, like chimes on a summer day. It was a while since I heard her laugh like that, but, then again, I didn't reunite with her until, knowingly, yesterday.

"Yeah, I know," she said. "I made that decision a little bit ago."

"That's good," I smiled contently as my hands in my pockets fidgeted nervously.

_"Would the standing rows please rise and exit the auditorium," _the student speaker announced. "_Please follow Mr. Yoshizaki by Door 3. Thank you."_

**Tsukuda Kiyomi's Point of View**

"We're already standing, geniuses!" someone shouted in jest. It wasn't exactly the best of manners, but it was relatively true. We _were_ standing because there were no more seats available.

Once we all reached Door 3, Mr. Yoshizaki gave us a brief introduction about him as well as giving us instructions, "Hi. My name is Mr. Yoshizaki, and I am your 'war' teacher today, so to speak. I'm thirty-two years old, and I teach college-level World History at Samezuka Academy. I say we win this thing for our team, don't you all say?"

An eruption of cheers were heard around Door 3 from the students—both guys and girls alike.

"Are you all ready to win?" Mr. Yoshizaki increased the level of spirit for our team.

"Yeah!" we all shouted at once, cheering endlessly.

"Now for the next pair of instructions," Mr. Yoshizaki continued. "Pick a partner, and that's who you'll be partnered with for the rest of the games for the following days. Got it?"

A series of nods and murmurs of agreements were heard until we all walked across our crowd to unite with partners.

As I was about to walk about in search of a partner, Rin grabbed my arm, forcing me to turn back and face him.

"Want to be partners?" he asked firmly.

I stared at him seriously before breaking out a chuckle, "Not like you'll be giving a choice in the first place, am I correct?"

He smiled before reluctantly wrapping an arm around my shoulder, "You could say that."

I rolled my eyes at his somewhat flirtatious action before immediately waving it off. We were strictly friends. Acquaintances, even. We barely knew each other, except for our former selves. This would be as far as it would get.

One of Rin's swim teammates (the uniform says it all, folks. I'm not a creepy stalker or anything) punched his shoulder playfully, giving me a short glance. He probably meant that 'shipping time' was apparent, but I simply rolled my eyes yet again. How immature could these guys get? To Level 100? Or infinity and beyond (no pun intended)?

He seemed hesitant before he added, "You want to . . . go for a walk after the games today?"

I paused—hesitant, before replying, "Sure, I guess . . . that is, if you help me with my homework."

He arched an eyebrow, "Since when did you need help with homework?"

"Since who wants to do homework?" I countered with a knowing smirk.

He laughed, "Sure. For now, let's beat everyone in this competition."

I simply nodded my head, "Sure."


End file.
